My wonderful HUSBAND
We have this "couple" that we are friends with. I don't yet feel comfortable using real names ... not yet anyways. But let's just call them "Adam & Eve" for now. *snickers*

They are about the only couple, around our age that always seemed like they had their heads on their shoulders so-to-speak. They have been together I think for like 14 or 15 years & married for about 9. They owned a house, had decent jobs (until the recession hit, and ended up in foreclosure ... like so many others) and they don't have any kids. Pretty much the only people we know, our age anyways, that don't. Of course, they decided long ago that they didn't want any either.

The only 'thing' is ... that they have what I guess you would call an open relationship. They are (in the loose sense of the word) swingers.

Yes, it's a little weird in my book, but they are adults and that's their choice. Once we made it clear that we were IN NO WAY interested in that, then they never brought it up again. I *do* know that mostly they are into bring another woman into their bed ... but I have also heard rumors about him screwing other girls while she was at work, etc. I just try to stay out of it, as that seems like WAY TOO much drama fro me to handle.

At one point, "Adam" tried to convince my husband that their lifestyle actually saved their marriage. Oooookay. But like I said, whatever works for them is their business.

Last night, Ryan called me up and said that the previous evening ... without any kind of warning "Eve" just up and left "Adam". She gave him NO REASON whatsoever. Just said that she was moving back to her moms.

Obviously "Adam" was in complete shock, and said to her. "Well its clear you've made up your mind, how are we going to split everything up?"

and her reply was "You keep everything ... I don't want any of it"

Hrrmmmm ... very suspicious. Anyways, Ryan seems to think that maybe she found a 'sugar-daddy' but no one really knows. How FUCKED UP is that??? So he took "Adam" out, along with a couple of other guys, to do the boys-night-thingy. Which was fine, I can understand he's probably crushed (although I *still* don't understand their whole relationship and how this hasn't come up before. I should also add, that she could VERY WELL have been screwing someone else too ... I don't know.

She was always bragging to me about how much she loved "Adam" and how perfect they are together ... blah,blah,blah. What really IRKS me, is that this morning, Ryan called me before I left for work, I could tell he was a little down, and he says to me "Man, that whole thing is just fucked up. Please promise me you'll never do anything like that to me ... I don't know how I could live without you."


While it was sweet, I can't help thinking ... my GOD! What is this world coming to??? I made a promise to him when we got married, and I believe in that promise ... or else I wouldn't have done it.

So, here were are ... amid yet another divorce (most likely) with Ryan and I being the last ones standing. Even though I always KNEW we would be ... I kind of feel like we deserve a medal or something! LOL

It just makes me HAPPY to know that while a lot of couples are finding it harder and harder to stay together, we have done nothing but grow closer with each passing year. And I'll be honest ... I cried when he said he didn't know how he could live without me. In all these years, he has never actually SAID that outloud ... IN THOSE WORDS. I knew he felt that way, but it was always more of a passing comment (Cuz you know ... tough guys don't admit those things *giggles*)

So here's to my wonderful husband, who just keeps getting better with age!!

Now if you'll excuse me, I think a few sext messages are calling my name xD

Changes in store!
Okie Dokie. Here's the scoop. I'm having the rotator cuff surgery on May 2nd. Completely freaked out and excited at the same time! I have never had anything major done, other than having my wisdom teeth out. But, I am SO looking forward to NOT being in pain every-single-fucking-day! So YAY!

Also, we are going to pick up the new vehicle on Saturday! I can't wait!

My boss is kind of being a douchekazoo about it ... but whatever. He can kiss my ass. I told him exactly what the doctor told me about how long I'll be gone etc. But my boss seems to think that Doctors always exaggerate and that I'll be good to go after 2 weeks. NOT!!!

At this point, I really don't even care anymore. He can find a new office manager (or as HE calls me ... SECRETARY!ewww)

Things on the home front are, well ... meh. Okay I guess. Jessica's hubby got his "money" ... but they are still living there, since he has a busted ankle , and she has to have this crazy epidural thingy (Its kind of complicated, and home nurses have to come over every day to check on it, etc)

BUT, for now they kind of keep quiet, and so do we. Hopefully as soon as his ankle heals, they will be looking for a house.
I still feel angry at the fact that they don't do their fair share around the house (when they aren't 'injured' LOL) and I hope to HELL that she has the decency to offer her parents some money for all those months they stayed RENT-FREE. Just my opinion though.

SOOOOO .... anyway, since this surgery is on my right-hand (my dominant hand) I am trying to prepare, so that things will be as easy for me as possible. I want to find some sport bras that have a zipper-closure in the front, so if anyone has ever found a good one, let me know!

Also, I'm probably going to have Ryan's cousin give me a wax treatment (Underarms, eyebrows ... possibly bikini (YIKES) because LORD KNOWS I don't trust my left hand to shave my lady bits!! LMAO

I have a STACK of books to read, Netflix, and my tablet to keep me company ... hellooooo Twiiter, Tumblr, and Fanfic!!

I am seriously considering giving my hair a good, healthy cut, and *possibly* even changing the color! What the hell, right? It's only hair, it can grow back. This is what I want:
January Jones

Any comments ... suggestions???

FINALLY! Some GOOD news!
OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG ... I could hardly sleep last night, I was so excited!

#1) So, the sister-in-law's husband (AKA DoucheyMcGee) finally got his money!! Which means that they will be moving out very soon!!!!


**SIDE NOTE: He is *still* such an idiot! He got a check for (I think $500,000.00) and the jackass tried to CASH it at a bank, that he still owed money too! ROFLMFAO!!

They wouldn't cash it unless they got their money, so he went to like 3 different banks, and they all said the same thing: You have to deposit it, and wait until it clears. DUH!!

Sunday, I heard them screaming at each other (ONCE AGAIN) and apparently that's what they were arguing about. GAWD he is s MORON!

He is trying to cheat the "system" because he owes a BUNCH of back-child support, as well as student loans, and he is trying to get ALL of the cash for himself. What an asshole! That's your fucking CHILD, give them the damn money ... SCROOGE!

Anyway, I don't care ... I can't contain my excitement that they will be gone SOON!

#2) Ryan and I have been looking at getting a new(er) car, and I found this beautiful one on craigslist. If we get enough money from selling the truck, we would only have to finance about half of the new one, so our payments would be REALLY feasible!
Here is a picture of the BEAUTY!


GAH! We would have so much more room, and the dogs could finally have a comfortable ride to the vet's office LOL (even though its only about 1/2 mile from our house ... hey, they deserve some comfort too, right?)

Everyone keep your fingers crossed that this one is still available! 

I laugh, because I have no other choice! Mwaaahaahaa
Let's play a little catch-up, shall we??

Friday, I went to the Ortho DR, and he did a bunch of crazy movements with my arm. Basically, it boils down to this: I have a muscle that is either severely irritated, or possibly torn. I have to get an MRI, to find out for sure, because if it IS torn, I will need surgery to repair it. I'm cool with that, as long as this pain gets under control. If it takes a surgery, then so be it. I AM READY to be healthy and pain-free, so we can start the 'baby-making' process again! *evil grin*

It was yet another DRAMA-FILLED weekend at the White House. You guys ... I swear, I'm starting to think that we are on some Godawful secret reality show, hosted by Ashton Kutcher! Any minute now, the cameraman is going to pop out and yell "Congratulations! You've been punked!"


Okay, I feel *slighty* better now. But I think I need another Xanax ;-} HEAVEN HELP ME

Happy Birthday to two of the sweetest gals on the planet! atxstnic AND luveskane !! I hope you BOTH have a wonderful day, and may all your wishes comes true! xoxo

Here ... have a little Dixon-love ;-}


Fuck you, you fucking fucker ;-P
I feel like I need a MAJOR change in my life (don't they call that a midlife crisis?!?)

Either way, I have been thinking all of these ridiculous thoughts lately. Like, I want to open a "store"! Mainly so I can be my own boss LMAO

But, I have worked retail before, and honestly, I really hate it. But how cool would it be to have a place where people can buy craft supplies, art supplies AS WELL AS buy original art/homemade crafts??

Might as well throw homemade detergents, and cleaning supplies too, right??

But not soap and candles ... because everyone and their uncle (around here anyways) makes soap and candles.

IDK, my brain is so mucked up with all this BULLSHIT at home (did I mention the sis-in-law & her douchebag have 'unofficially' moved back in???)
Yeah, it was supposed to be for 3 days ... that was a month ago!! Come to find out, the guy they were living with doesn't want them back. Huh. Interesting. Why do I get the feeling that they were kicked out in the first place ... but didn't want to mention that part?

So, once again, I feel like my life (Well OUR LIFE, including Ryan) is on hold because of their stupidity. No, the DB still hasn't gotten his "money" yet ... shocker.

But they DID get HUGE matching (and might I add ... fucking UGLY) tattoos on their legs!! HA!!

Sweet irony ... they say something about "in sickness and in health". Pffft! The reason he wanted a divorce a few months ago, was because he didn't think he could handle having a sick wife!!!!


Anywhoooo ... I just needed to get that off my chest.
Hope ya'll have a good weekend!!

I am definitely going thru a funk right now. I feel like I have raging PMS like every day. I'm up , then I'm down ... then I'm up again, then I'm crying. I have so many things that are tearing me apart inside and out.

BUT, at the same time I have so many things to be thankful for. My husband especially. Every day that goes by we get stronger and closer ... and after 18 years, I assumed we would be just another old married couple LOL. But honestly, that's not the case. I don't know what I would do without him ... I really don't. 

I need some motivation or something. It's like, once I had to quit classes ... I lost all of my ambition. I have so many things that I really *WANT* to do! So many projects, etc ...  whether it's writing, or artwork, or even just simple crafts for friends and family. Yet, I get home from work, make dinner, clean up, spend some time with the hubby , and by then I have no desire to do anything else. Even on the weekends, I keep saying "This weekend I'm going to get my desk cleaned up" or "This weekend I'm going to finish that scratchboard".

And still ... nothing. 

Ryan joined a gym and I would LOVE to go with him, but with my shoulder still a complete mess, I don't dare do anything to make it worse. I need to make a Doctor's appt, but I'm still trying to pay off the damn dentist. I can't believe how crappy my insurance is. Thankfully we just sent it Ryan's information thru his work, so hopefully soon we will get insurance thru his employer and I can get rid of this awful policy I have ;-}

Any ideas?? I HAVE to get past this. And soon. It sucks way too much.

God, I was looking thru all of my old posts ... BLECH! So much crap. I guess I don't really have anyone (in person) to vomit all this crap about my sis-in-law. So, unfortunately it goes here. SO SORRY that you all have to see it ... and trust me, I won't mind one bit if you skip right over them! It's more or less a place for me to get it out of my system.

That being said, I think my earlier post was sent a little too soon. LOL, I don't know what is going on, but I know there was a funeral yesterday (one of Jessica's friends mother passed away). So Jess & her mom went to the funeral, and came back with the Douchebag in tow.

I just wanna ask you guys ONE question. Am I completely crazy??

They had a "fight" last weekend, and he told her he (and I quote here) "Needed a few days to think about whether or not he wanted to be married to her"

I don't know what happened, and I don't care. But why in the EVER-LOVING-FUCK would he be allowed in our house??

I'm really let down by Ryan's parents ... they talk a lot of game, but just as usual, they let her do anything she damn well pleases ... and it pisses me off to no end.

They have apparently advised her to wait until he gets his money (which could be a cold day in hell) and then divorce him and take half.
It sounds all good in theory ... he deserves to get socked in the pocketbook (among other places). But, wouldn't it just be better to get out of the marriage now? Who gives a fuck about his stupid money. I'm so tired of having to hear about all of it.

And I'm sure this makes me a total bitch, but you know what? I don't even feel remotely sorry for her anymore. Sure, I don't want to see her in pain ... but I feel like all of this is her own damn fault and she needs to SUCK IT UP and deal. Period. 

**There is a tad bit of good news on the homefront. Ryan's dad *finally* got his back pay for Social Security, so they are doing much better. It may be a couple of months before he is able to access his pension. Ryan tells me, that once he gets THAT they want to move to a better climate, and we would stay here (I think I mentioned this before) so they can continue to build equity, for a few years at least.

The only issue I see ... is, once again, the sis-in-law. I get this feeling, that her "issues" are going to cause a delay in the parents relocation efforts. I can just see it now ... they won't want to move until all her bullshit is settled, which will prevent Ryan and I from having any fucking privacy, and delay our plans to start a family. 

I don't know what the hell to do. I really don't. Ryan is insistent that we can't buy a house, because he doesn't see the sense in paying two mortgages (once his parents leave). Personally, I think that day is a LONG WAY OFF, and we should start looking for a place NOW while I am still working. But I understand that if we move, they will have to sell the house when they leave ... and with the market in the shitter, they'd most likely lose money. *HEAVY SIGH*

Everything just feels so fucked up right now. No wonder I didn't even want to get out of bed LOL

I just feel like something HAS to give, or I may loose every ounce of sanity I have left. And there isn't much there to begin with! Ohhhh, what I wouldn't give for a wining lottery ticket right about now ;-}


I should have known ... the "happy couple" is back at it again. I cant believe it. Can you imagine after 3 months of marriage your husband or wife telling you that they need a few days to 'think about wether or not they want to be married to you'???!!? And THEN ... staying with them? ugh! i dont know what the ever-loving-fuck is going thru her mind. Now they are both here, making my life miserable again.
Calgon ... TAKE ME AWAY!! LMAO

(no subject)

WOW. The sis-in-law and her douchebag ... are *already* talking about divorce. I think I'm actually surprised. (Not that the relationship was doomed... but that it didn't take her YEARS to realize it)
Don't get me wrong ... I'm not happy that she is hurt and upset , but I'm glad that she may actually FINALLY understand what an asshole he is!
*Deep Breath* Now comes the tough part. Helping her heal is NOT going to be an easy task.


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